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Interview with Galcian

By Drekenloka (Tim)

 

Me: Hello and thank you for joining us.

Galcian: A pleasure.

Me: For our first question, how would you describe your relationship with the cast?

Galcian: Pretty good. Vyse was great, and we all made friends quickly. The worst was with Gregorio, a.k.a. Mr. Righteous. You know how we fought on Dangral Island?

Me: Yeah. You beat him but good.

Galcian: Yeah, well, I wasn’t supposed to kill him. Originally, he was supposed to give up and become my partner. But, I killed him.

Me: I imagine the director wasn’t too thrilled.

Galcian: No, he wasn’t. And as punishment, he changed the script. Now Alfonso was to be my second-in-command.

Me: But,…

Galcian: Well, why do you think I called down the Rains on Valua first? The director planned for me to call them upon Nasrad, but…

Me: What did the director say?

Galcian: Nothing. I disemboweled him.

Me: Ah. Now, any fun stunts?

Galcian: The train scene. You know how I trail Vyse and Co. in Valua? Originally De Loco was planned to trail them. However, after Vyse uttered the words "Bubble Boy", the whole cast cracked up-including De Loco. He fell off the train.

Me: Eh. Now, Galcian, you haven’t mentioned your relationship with Ramirez yet. What did you think of him?

Galcian: No comment.

Me: Now that’s just wrong… Anyway, what about the rumor that you have violence problems?

Galcian: Those are completely false. As a matter of fact, I have several hobbies, including cooking, gardening, lopping off the heads of innocent civilians…

Me: Pardon?

Galcian: Curses! You have found out my horrible secret! Now, I must lop off YOUR head!

Me: With what? Security took away your sword. Want this? <waves around sword>

Galcian: Can I have my sword back?

Me: What would you do with it?

Galcian: I would TERRORIZE THE WORLD AND SLAUGHTER… uh.. I mean… I would use it to give fluffy kittens free flea haircuts.

Me: Nice try, Buster. You blew it.

Galcian: Oh crap. Please?

Me: DON’T SAY THAT! And no.

Galcian: Pleeeeeeeease? Pretty please?

Me: NO!

<Galcian starts crying uncontrollably>

Me: Well, I guess that’s all. G’bye and join us next time!